"Like Murakami, I am not even a writer. I am just a person who writes."
Am I a mountain biker? I'm trying to minimize that as my identity, as it can quickly get in the way of my family relationships. For example, I almost ruined my marriage in its early days with my obsession with the sport of mototrials.
Am I someone who rides a mountain bike? Yes, but there's more to it than just an enjoyable activity.
Am I someone who's disciplined about practicing, who's trying to get better at learning how to learn? Yes, that's closer but still me-focused.
Am I someone who's trying to give back to the sport of mountain biking? Yes. But it's a constant struggle since my ego/desire to impress is much stronger.
Every week I renew my commitment that I am responsible for giving back to the sport I love. And to balance that with behavior that shows my commitment to being a better husband, dad, grandpa, brother, friend, neighbor, and citizen.
So I'm still seeking/working damn hard but with a different purpose than just trying to be somebody. Some weeks, I make progress. On other weeks, not so much.
Hey Griff, Yeah, this has always been a delicate balance for me. And I'm sure it can be for other obsessive types. I have a tendency to dive 1000% into these addictive activities. Maybe in my writing I came across as swinging a little to far in the other direction (completely detaching from the activity) but you're right it can be a tricky balance. I think recognizing it is important, though. I'm still learning about this balacne, but i've definitely found that getting too caught up in them is detrimental to performance. For example, in rock climbing, the more obsessed i get, the more I put tie my self-worth to the activity, the more I end up getting in my own way, making myself nervous and performing worse. I've found the same for writing. Sometimes trying too hard makes me worse. Anyway, food for thought, i guess. i'm still figuring this all out
I love reading these sm! This idea also highlights for me that as you get experienced in a sport/activity, its so important to stay humble and be confident in your own progress regardless of the people around you. Just because someone new manages to be better than us on a given day does not mean you or I need to question our identity or commitment to the sport. People come from different backgrounds and everyone progresses differently. Very cliche but still easy to forget for me personally.
I couldn't agree more! I feel like once we pass the "beginner phase" we start to add this crazy pressure to ourselves. I feel it in climbing sometimes. Like why do i feel the need to perform at a certain level. Like if i did the same climb two years ago I would've been over the moon.. but now I'm like oh well the footwork was bad so i'm disappointed... why?? Thanks for reading! and for you comment
Christopher, you wrote:
"Like Murakami, I am not even a writer. I am just a person who writes."
Am I a mountain biker? I'm trying to minimize that as my identity, as it can quickly get in the way of my family relationships. For example, I almost ruined my marriage in its early days with my obsession with the sport of mototrials.
Am I someone who rides a mountain bike? Yes, but there's more to it than just an enjoyable activity.
Am I someone who's disciplined about practicing, who's trying to get better at learning how to learn? Yes, that's closer but still me-focused.
Am I someone who's trying to give back to the sport of mountain biking? Yes. But it's a constant struggle since my ego/desire to impress is much stronger.
Every week I renew my commitment that I am responsible for giving back to the sport I love. And to balance that with behavior that shows my commitment to being a better husband, dad, grandpa, brother, friend, neighbor, and citizen.
So I'm still seeking/working damn hard but with a different purpose than just trying to be somebody. Some weeks, I make progress. On other weeks, not so much.
Hey Griff, Yeah, this has always been a delicate balance for me. And I'm sure it can be for other obsessive types. I have a tendency to dive 1000% into these addictive activities. Maybe in my writing I came across as swinging a little to far in the other direction (completely detaching from the activity) but you're right it can be a tricky balance. I think recognizing it is important, though. I'm still learning about this balacne, but i've definitely found that getting too caught up in them is detrimental to performance. For example, in rock climbing, the more obsessed i get, the more I put tie my self-worth to the activity, the more I end up getting in my own way, making myself nervous and performing worse. I've found the same for writing. Sometimes trying too hard makes me worse. Anyway, food for thought, i guess. i'm still figuring this all out
Yep, me as well. And in this instance, both of us need to remember what you wrote about James Clear and Atomic Habits recently:
"In the first few chapters, he talks about the idea of “continuous improvement” and reframing the way we measure progress."
Loved it.
I love reading these sm! This idea also highlights for me that as you get experienced in a sport/activity, its so important to stay humble and be confident in your own progress regardless of the people around you. Just because someone new manages to be better than us on a given day does not mean you or I need to question our identity or commitment to the sport. People come from different backgrounds and everyone progresses differently. Very cliche but still easy to forget for me personally.
I couldn't agree more! I feel like once we pass the "beginner phase" we start to add this crazy pressure to ourselves. I feel it in climbing sometimes. Like why do i feel the need to perform at a certain level. Like if i did the same climb two years ago I would've been over the moon.. but now I'm like oh well the footwork was bad so i'm disappointed... why?? Thanks for reading! and for you comment